Summary of "beyond Rivalry"

During childhood, siblings are a major part of each other's lives, for better or for worse. As adults they may drift aparts as they become involved in their own careers, marriages and families. But in later life, which retirement from career, an empty home, and parents and sometiomes spouses gone, brothers and sisters often turn back to each other for a special affinity and link to the past. Psychologist of the University of Hartford Michael Kahn says "In the stressful, fast-pased world we live in, the siblings relationship becomes for many the only intimate connection that seems to last" And psychologist Deborah Gold of the Duke Center for the Study of Aging and Human Development points out,"Since people are living longer and are healthier longer, they will be more capable of giving help." But siblings may not turn to each other for help because of latent rivalry. They may believe that if they need to call on a brother or sister they are admitting that the other person is a success and I am a failure. Almost all of the people in God's study said they would rather than continue on their own than ask their brother or sister for help. But Gold found that a chrisis beyond control would inspire a rallying of some or all siblings around the brother or sister in need. Despite the quarreling and competition many people associate with the mere mention of their brothers and sisters, most of us will find unexpected strengths in this relationship in later life.